Life on Life’s terms

There's no gentle way of putting this, so....Life doesn't get easier just because we got sober.

More enjoyable? Sure, but not necessarily easy. Life is still full of responsibilities, loss, bills and...well, LIFE. When life comes at us, sobriety is sometimes difficult. It's simple to blame everything on the fact that we're not drinking & using and might even conclude that one drink would make things a bit better.

But it's never "just one", and we wind up destroying all of our hard work and repeating the same dreadful cycle again or worse; robbing ourselves of the opportunity of getting sober again.

When things are difficult, it is an opportunity presenting itself, to develop and learn. You will feel stronger when you emerge from the other side. When we're on this sober journey, things get tough in life. However, there are so many things we can do that are much more beneficial than drinking or using drugs.

Below we've listed our 5 favorite things to do to help keep our sobriety when life seems difficult. 

Ask for Help

We aren't in this alone and no-one is perfect. Sometimes we approach a problem the wrong way, other times we've just never dealt with the situation sober before. Either way, what's the worst part about asking for help? You get help! Then you have to deal with your inner critic (that negative voice in your head) telling you that you should be able to handle things on your own. Silence the inner critic. Ask for help, accept the help and be thankful you have people around you to help. 

Go Outside

Get out into nature. Go for a walk, hop on a bicycle or go sit in the park. Being out in nature reduces stress, cortisol levels and muscle tension. It's also nice just to take in how beautiful our surroundings are. It can realign your thought process and the problems you were dwelling on won’t seem as big and more approachable.

Gratitude

Take a few deep breaths and really think about your present day in sobriety; then list off out loud, in your head or write down things you are grateful for. It sounds stupid, but it's a therapeutic process that can't be disputed. Gratitude is a powerful thing. It can help get you refocused on why you are doing what you're doing and also motivate you to keep what you have.

Connection

Get out of yourself and link up with other sober people. go offer help to someone else. Sometimes a simple "how are you doing today?" or "Do you need help with anything today?" goes a long way. It gets you out of your head and could very well help break down another person's barrier of asking for help for themselves. But it also assists you to recognize that you have purpose and helps build meaningful relationships.

Take a Break

There's nothing wrong with taking a step back and saying "I need a minute". Whether it be at work, out with friends or on a call. Take a minute to regroup, clear your head, call a friend and just get out of the moment. Then once you're cleared up and calm, re-enter. This is a much better approach than saying or doing something you will regret or make things worse. It might seem weird at first and if you're with people or at a job interview, the other people might say "did...did they just say they need a minute and walk off?" but ultimately, what they're saying is "I didn't even know that was an option!" and they more often than not will admire your awareness and start doing it themselves. 

There are many more things to do and a variety of techniques for calming the mind and dealing with life in sobriety. Just reading about them isn't enough though, actually apply these 5 to your life, add to the list and keep learning and growing. Take action and life is so much more enjoyable, Sobriety loses the blame for things being difficult, and we begin to appreciate the journey we're on and the people that are on it with us.